Sobriety as a Tool for Change
The outrage and heartbreak we are feeling, and the reckoning long due about systemic racism demand the attention and effort of all of us. I personally have much work to do internally, and amends to make. I’m reading, listening and supporting causes, some suggestions gleaned from this excellent list.
I admit my part in inaction and apathy afforded by extreme white privilege. The real work of talking about racism and dismantling unjust systems is hard and messy. And how do many of us deal with things that are hard and messy?
When overcome with difficult emotions, for decades I turned to the most recognized coping tool on planet earth – alcohol. In the last 15 months alcohol free, I’ve begun to reconnect with my feelings and how to use them as indicator lights and how to process and respond to them. I communicate daily with a group of 50 sobriety coaches (all former drinkers). We coach, and are in social media groups, with tens of thousands of people who share their experiences from inside their current alcohol dependency. And from these collective experiences, the shared story is this: alcohol masked my emotions, numbed my senses, sapped my motivation and stole my voice and power.
Given that people of color are fighting for their lives, with their lives, just to get that voice and power, it feels disrespectful to cavalierly toss aside my own when it could be used to help this fight.
As I’ve said, I’ve got much work to do and I’m sure that on most days I’ll not know what to do, or feel afraid or overwhelmed or out of my comfort zone or inadequate. But I will actually feel my feelings…whether feelings of outrage, frustration, guilt, hope, solidarity and love. I must use my clear vision to see my privilege. I must use my voice and my power to be an ally.